


i choose you

by ab82



Category: Scream (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-03
Updated: 2016-09-05
Packaged: 2018-08-12 20:54:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7948822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ab82/pseuds/ab82
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>audrey jensen has grown up believing that she and emma duval are soulmates. the first words emma ever said to her -- "you have pretty eyes" -- have been tattooed on her wrist since she was twelve. but the thing about emma is, she doesn't have a soulmate tattoo. not yet. and when they stop being friends their freshman year, emma's skin is still blank. but when they reunite sophomore year, emma has words tattooed on her hipbone. </p><p>except they're not audrey's first words to her. they're kieran's.</p><p>(aka the one where emma is audrey's soulmate, but audrey isn't emma's, and their lives suddenly become even more complicated.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. one

**Author's Note:**

> soo if you read my author's notes from "words", you know that i teased another emrey story! and here it is. it's still being written, but i got so excited about it that i decided to post the first chapter. it's not very long, but hopefully it'll be enough for now! :) 
> 
> couple of things:  
> 1) in this world, there's such a thing as people who have soulmates, but they are not their soulmates' soulmates (god i hope that made sense lol). if you're one of those people, they're called an "unrequited soulmate"; i took that from the term "unrequited love", which is basically what it is but on a deeper level. unrequited soulmates are rare; they make up 1% of the population, or about 7 million people. audrey goes through her entire life thinking that emma will, naturally, be her soulmate, because it's SO rare to be an unrequited soulmate and so the thought honestly never crosses her mind that she could have emma's first words to her tattooed on her skin and emma wouldn't, someday, have audrey's first words to her on her skin. so that's why she's so surprised by it, and why you'll see her get so giddy when emma tells her "oh yeah, i got my soulmate tattoo when we weren't friends". so don't judge poor bby audrey or call her naïve/foolish (god knows she beats herself up enough over it), it's honestly so rare that it just never crossed her mind!  
> 2) the idea of having your soulmate's first words to you appear on your skin is not my own, as i said in the preface to "words". it's been floating around AO3 for a while, but if you know who came up with the idea originally, please let me know!  
> 3) again, many thanks to RavenRambles, who let me bounce ideas off of them and is 99% of the reason why i got this first chapter out so quickly!
> 
> all that being said, thank you very much for reading and, as always, comments are appreciated and encouraged. much love to you all! long live emrey hahaha

The past few years of Audrey Jensen’s life have been defined by loving Emma Duval.

 

Not that she’d reduce herself to her romantic interests or anything like that. She’s an independent woman who can function on her own, with or without a significant other. But her love for Emma has caused a lot of important events to happen in her life, which is why she says these years have been defined by it. And also, finding out that Emma is her soulmate _is_ pretty life-changing.

 

Emma and Audrey met when they were four years old. The first words out of Audrey’s mouth had been, “You have really pretty hair.” (Stupid, she knows.) And Emma had replied, “You have pretty eyes.” Those words have been lazily scrawled across her wrist since her twelfth summer, when they’d first appeared and Audrey had initially discovered that her best friend was also her soulmate. Which was convenient, because Audrey’s always been kind of in love with her.

 

The thing is, Emma’s special, in more ways than one, but one of her most unique traits is the utter _absence_ of a soulmate tattoo. She’s been waiting sixteen years, checks herself every morning to see if black cursive script has appeared somewhere, but Emma’s body is still a blank page. She has no idea who her soulmate is.

 

And for four years, Audrey’s been praying that someday, _You have really pretty hair_ will show up on her best friend’s skin. 

 

Except they’re not best friends anymore. Not really. Emma left her for Nina Patterson and her cronies last year, and she’s only _just_ re-entered Audrey’s life, and honestly everything has been so crazy lately. Emma’s crazy half-sister, the actual daughter of Brandon James, had murdered not just Nina, but also Tyler O’Neill, Riley Marra, Sheriff Hudson, Will Belmont, and, most devastatingly of all, Rachel Murray.

 

Rachel. Rachel was the girl that Audrey turned to after Emma left; they’d met through an online forum for film geeks, though Audrey can’t even look at a camera after Piper’s rampage, and clicked instantly. She hadn’t been Emma, not by any means, but she had been sweet and funny and _good_ to Audrey. They weren’t soulmates. Rachel never told her she had pretty hair, and the first thing that Audrey’d said to her wasn’t anywhere close to the _It’s so nice to meet you_ on Rachel’s leg. But she’d been there, and she’d been enough.

 

She’d been killed in a staged suicide by Piper, and it’s all Audrey’s fault. Even now, three weeks after Piper’s reveal and a month and a half after Rachel’s death, Audrey still can’t sleep at night. She wrote the letters to Piper begging her to come to Lakewood, so they could film a “revenge documentary exposing the true nature of the pretty people”. Yeah, that never happened. Instead, Rachel ended up in a morgue with a rope around her neck, and Piper’s body still hasn’t been found. And Emma, her _soulmate_ — Emma’s fucking devastated.

 

But Emma doesn’t even know they’re soulmates. She’s dating Kieran Wilcox, Sheriff Hudson’s son who’d only just moved to Lakewood back in October. Audrey doesn’t trust him, not really, but she guesses she could call him her friend. Her, Kieran, Emma, Brooke, Jake, Noah — they’ve all gotta stick together. They’ve been dubbed the Lakewood Six, the survivors of Piper Shaw’s murder spree, and as such, they’d fall apart without each other. It’s just the way things are now. And Audrey’s never told Emma that they’re soulmates, partially because she doesn’t want to ruin their friendship, and also because when she gets her tattoo, she wants it to be special for Emma. She feels like she’d be spoiling the whole thing by telling Emma, _Oh, yeah, we’vebeen friends for twelve years, and you’re my soulmate by the way._ Although when freshman year happened, she _had_ been left wishing she’d told the other girl.

 

So. It’s three weeks after the reveal. Emma’s heading off to rehab tomorrow, her way of learning how to cope with the permanent scar that Piper’s left on her heart. They’re sitting on Emma’s bed, sharing a bottle of Cheerwine (Audrey’s favorite) and flipping through old scrapbooks. And Audrey’s debating whether or not to tell her. 

 

But then Emma reaches over her to grab the Cheerwine, and the hem of her shirt lifts up and Audrey catches a glimpse of black. _Black._ “Whoa, Emma,” she says slowly, “did you get your soulmate tattoo?” 

 

“Oh, yeah,” Emma grins. “I actually got it last year, on my fifteenth birthday. Wanna see it?” 

 

And of course Audrey stutters out a _yeah_ , because this is it, this is the moment she’s been waiting for since she was twelve. Fantasies are suddenly rushing through her brain, images of Emma’s hip reading _You have really pretty hair_ and her pulling Audrey in for a kiss, soundbites of Emma going, “You’re my soulmate, Auds,” and all the delicious words that would come to follow after that.

 

She’s giddy, happier than she’s been in a long time, because she's got her soulmate, and she may have brought Piper to Lakewood but the black words that Emma is about to show her will prove that she is not irredeemable and _she has a chance_. This is the beginning of the rest of her life, the day she finds her soulmate, the kind of thing they show in the movies and write about in romance novels. Audrey’s smiling, probably wider than Emma’s ever seen her smile before, and watches as Emma pulls up her shirt and displays the words on her hip, the ones that read _No, no, you’re okay_ — 

 

Wait, what? Those aren’t the first words Audrey said to her. 

 

Audrey re-reads the words again and the throbbing in her chest alerts her to the very real sensation of her heart cracking in two. Because she’s not Emma’s soulmate. She quickly glances at her right wrist, just to double-check that _You have pretty eyes_ is still there, and yup, it is. And Audrey may sometimes be naïve when it comes to Emma Duval, but she’s the farthest thing from stupid, and it doesn’t take her brain long to figure out what’s going on.

 

She’s what they call an unrequited soulmate. The genetic flaw, the scientific abnormality they make specials about on CNN, the 1% of the world whose soulmate is not matched to them. Someone who is not the soulmate for _their_ soulmate. Audrey Jensen is part of the 7 million people on this earth who will never be truly loved back.

 

_Well, it makes sense. You’re a terrible person. You brought Piper to Lakewood, you weren’t with Rachel the night she died, you never told Emma that she had a half-sister. You don’t_ deserve _a soulmate. Serves you right._ Those are the thoughts that preoccupy her mind, and she’s vaguely aware of Emma droning on about how it’d shown up, and Audrey had been the first person she’d wanted to call but they hadn’t been friends then, but Audrey’s not listening. Her ears are ringing with words unspoken, words she’d wanted to say and words she’d never wanted to hear. 

 

“Audrey? Are you okay?” Emma’s hand is on her shoulder, gentle but still enough to make Audrey finally shatter, and she’s up in a flash, grabbing her bag off the floor and storming towards the door. 

 

“What’s going on? Did I say something wrong? _Audrey_?” Emma calls after her, following her downstairs and all the way out onto the Duvals’ front yard, but all Audrey can think is _I’m not enough for anyone_ , and then she’s driving away, leaving Emma a distant blur in the background. 

 

_As she should be. Because that’s all you’ll ever be to her._


	2. two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> trying to get this done before monday. fingers crossed!

Kieran Wilcox is the killer the second time around. And Audrey sees it coming from a mile away, has always had this nagging suspicion since she saw Rachel’s video of him with Nina at the bar, but it’s still a shock to everyone. Especially Emma. _Of course_ especially Emma, because Kieran was her soulmate and instead of loving her like she deserved, he fucked her psychotic half-sister and made plans to slaughter everyone she loved.

 

It makes Audrey sick. It makes her blood boil. It makes her hands shake with anger and her skin break out in a cold sweat, because how unfair is _that_? To Emma. To her. To all the people who died by Kieran’s hand. Unfair to Emma, because she’s got such a genuinely _good_ soul, and she should have the world, the _universe_ in her soulmate. Instead, she got psychological torture and a long scar down her arm. Unfair to Audrey herself, because Emma is her soulmate and if she can’t have Emma, she should at least be able to have the satisfaction of seeing Emma be with someone who really cares for her. Instead, Emma ended up with a serial killer. Unfair to everyone who Kieran killed, because how could it have been their fault that Piper Shaw just _happened_ to be Kieran Wilcox’s soulmate? How were they supposed to know?

 

No one could’ve known. And that’s what she tells Emma, over and over again, in the weeks following Kieran’s reveal. But those words aren’t enough, Emma still shakes and weeps and cries herself to sleep every night, and Audrey very quickly realizes that she’s going to have to share her pain with Emma. She’s going to have to come clean about Emma being her soulmate, because Emma needs to hear it from someone who’s been through the same thing, that being an unrequited soulmate is _painful as hell_ but also _one hundred percent survivable_. 

 

So one Friday night, almost a month after Kieran’s reveal and arrest, Audrey invites Emma over to her place for a movie marathon and then a sleepover, their childhood Friday night ritual. She buys plenty of chocolate and popcorn so Emma can have all the magic mix she wants, makes sure she’s got enough blankets because Emma is always cold and shivery (especially as of late), and even breaks out the fresh balsam Bath & Body Works candles that have been gathering dust since freshman year. They’re Emma’s favorite, and so Audrey used to always burn them for her when she came over; tonight will be no exception. _See, Kieran?_ This _is how Emma Duval should be treated._

 

Emma actually shows up thirty minutes early. Audrey knows she had plans with Brooke earlier that day, but she also knows the girl can’t stand to be alone for very long now, so she doesn’t say anything. Emma only realizes that she’s early when she walks in to Audrey still cleaning her room, feather duster in one hand, bottle of Fabuloso in the other. She offers to help, but Audrey doesn’t let her, just tells her she can sit on the bed and they’ll talk while Audrey cleans. This is perfect, actually; they’ll get the heavy stuff out of the way first, and then they move on with their movie marathon. She’s already got a bowl of magic mix waiting for Emma in the kitchen. 

 

“So, how’ve you been?” Audrey begins, working on a spot on her dresser with the feather duster.

 

“Well, you know. I’ve been better,” Emma says, staring down at her hands. Audrey glances out of the corner of her eye and sees that they’re shaking. Did Emma forget her medication today? She’s been on Xanax since Kieran’s reveal, her anxiety deemed manageable without a return to rehab, but it doesn’t always completely squash the fear, and Emma sometimes won’t take it without a reminder.

 

She opens her mouth to ask, but it’s like Emma can read her mind and knows what’s coming, because she quickly continues, “Don’t ask if I’ve taken my meds. I have. They’re just not… doing much, lately.” 

 

Audrey abandons her cleaning to give Emma a hug, but she doesn’t let herself linger in it for too long. She feels like that’d be taking advantage of Emma’s emotional state right now, and that’s not fair to either of them. “I’ve got some magic mix in the kitchen. How about I go get us a bowl?” she suggests. 

 

Emma nods and whispers, “Thanks. That’d be really nice.” 

 

When Audrey returns not five minutes later with the magic mix, however, Emma is curled up into a ball and crying her eyes out onto Audrey’s bedspread. She drops the magic mix by the bed and is at Emma’s side in an instant, rubbing her best imitation of soothing circles into the girl’s back and encouraging her to breathe. The best thing to do when Emma’s having a breakdown, Audrey’s learned, is to just be there and let her cry it out. Emma’s sobs always break her heart, but there’s no other option.

 

After what feels like an eternity, Emma’s tears finally subside, and she sits up, rubbing at her eyes. “I’m sorry,” she sniffles. “It’s just — I just can’t get Kieran out of my head today. He killed _so many people_ , Audrey. People we both loved. How could he do that? He was my _soulmate_.” She pauses for a moment, then adds bitterly, “Well, I guess that didn’t matter to him. Piper was his soulmate, not me. God, I must be the only girl in Lakewood without a soulmate, huh?” Emma laughs hollowly at this, and Audrey knows it’s time to tell her story, can only hope it might help a _little_ bit.

 

“Actually, Em, you’re not,” she says quietly.

 

“Wait, what?” Emma turns to her, eyes wide and tears temporarily forgotten. 

 

“It’s complicated, but, uh… I’m an unrequited soulmate,” Audrey murmurs, thumbing at her mouth, the way she always does when she gets nervous around Emma. “I’ve known who my soulmate was since I was twelve, but she — I’m not her soulmate. So you’re not the only girl in Lakewood without a soulmate.” 

 

“Oh, my god. I’m so sorry, Audrey.” Emma pulls her into a hug, and Audrey relaxes into her touch. When they pull apart, Emma says, “I guess I just always assumed it was Rachel. And I didn’t want to press, cuz, well —”

 

“What would be the point?” Audrey finishes for her. “Yeah, I know. She wasn’t my soulmate, though.”

 

“So who is?” Emma asks softly. 

 

Audrey’s heart is suddenly slamming against her ribcage, her palms sweaty and her mouth like a desert. She licks at her lips, clears her throat a couple times, then says, “Are you sure you want to know?” When Emma nods, Audrey sighs and resigns herself to her fate. _You were gonna have to be honest one day, anyway._

 

“It’s you,” she tells her, gathering up the courage to look Emma in the eyes as she does it. And those eyes are very telling; Audrey watches as they expand in shock, dull with the slightest bit of hurt, and finally, shine with tears, all in the span of a few seconds. 

 

“Oh my God,” Emma breathes, lip quivering as she grabs Audrey’s hand and twines their fingers together. Audrey shivers but lets her do it anyway. “I’m so sorry, Audrey, why didn’t you—”

 

“It’s okay,” Audrey cuts her off. “I shouldn’t have told you, anyway. Please don’t be sorry. Let’s just watch the movie.” She leans over to reach for the remote, but Emma stops her.

 

“No. _No_ ,” she insists. “Tell me everything. I need to know.”

 

“Everything? Where would you even want me to start?” Audrey questions. This was a terrible idea; now Emma’s going to feel awful, and with the guilt about Kieran still weighing on her, that’s the last thing she needs. 

 

“How you found out. And how it feels,” Emma replies. There’s a certainty in her tone that tells Audrey she really _does_ want to know, that she’s not just asking in some attempt to make Audrey feel better or out of politeness.

 

“Uh, okay.” So Audrey tells her. She bares her soul and gives every gory detail, stopping sometimes when she thinks it’s too much, but continuing when Emma squeezes her hand and encourages her to keep going. She talks about finding _Your eyes are pretty_ on her wrist while picking strawberries with her mother, her last summer with her before she went away to Boston. She details the feeling of being an unrequited soulmate, how it’s like living in a constant state of confusion, her body always screaming at her for _Emma_ but her brain warning her to not get too attached because she’d just get hurt anyway. She shares the memory of seeing Emma’s soulmate tattoo for the first time, back in November, and confesses that _the tattoo_ was the reason why she’d stormed off that day, not the BS “bad flashback” excuse she’d given back then. She lays it all out, every single piece of her heart, and lets Emma take what she wants from it. Because that’s what Emma has asked her for, really, and if Emma Duval wants it from her, she’s going to get it.

 

When she finishes, Emma’s staring at her, and even with twelve years’ worth of experience, Audrey can’t for the life of her decipher the look on her face. “I’m so sorry, Auds,” she whispers. “I never meant to hurt you. I never do.”

 

“It’s not your fault,” Audrey says gently. And really, it’s not. It’s some fluke of nature, some awful mistake on _something’s_ part, but it’s not her fault. Maybe once upon a time she used to blame it on Emma, but not anymore. She’s had too many people blame her for things she couldn’t control to do that. “Look,” she continues, suddenly feeling more at peace than she has in a long time, “let’s just forget about soulmates for a while, okay? Soulmates don’t define us. Kieran doesn’t define you, and you don’t define me. Let’s just _recover_.” 

 

And as it turns out, that’s what they spend the next few months doing.

 

∞

Things are so much easier, now that Emma knows. It hasn’t changed their friendship at all, though if their friendship could survive that awkward love confession in the barn, then Audrey suspects it could weather just about anything. She spends her days focusing on herself and her friends, trying to ease the nightmares, trying to deal with the demons that Piper and Kieran left behind. Emma’s taken off her Xanax and starts seeing a new therapist who teaches her how to deal with her guilt, _sans_ medication. Audrey starts therapy as well, though she only goes once a month, not once a week like Emma does — she’s still getting used to the whole _detailing your emotions to a stranger_ thing. 

 

They spend their time focused on recovery rather than regrets. And recovery is… beautiful, honestly. It’s afternoons curled up in booths at the coffee shop, head on Emma’s shoulder as they study for their Psych test. It’s weekends at Brooke’s place on the lake, which she can finally enter without crying, and Friday evenings at the game shop with Noah. It’s Saturdays shopping with Brooke, which is difficult for Audrey to stomach at first because she _hates_ shopping, but she goes because the first time Brooke and Emma went alone, Emma had a panic attack after seeing a leather jacket like Kieran’s, and Brooke had called her sobbing, not sure how to deal with it. It’s starting back her childhood ritual with Emma, the Friday night movie marathons, and including Stavo, Brooke, and Noah. It’s being surrounded by people she loves, and learning to try to move past the actions of people she hated (and to remember the person she once loved). 

 

It’s September, seven months after Kieran’s reveal and almost a year after the original killings, when Emma tells her she loves her. They’re sitting in Audrey’s bedroom, the same place they were for the soulmate confession, poring over a copy of _Hamlet_ for AP Lit. Audrey’s cracking jokes, and Emma’s laughing, tears streaming down her face from it actually, when she stops and says, “God, I love you.” 

 

Audrey freezes, because _what_? There’s no way she just said that. She’s vaguely aware of shaking her head, but then Emma nods and repeats, more firmly this time, “Yeah. I love you, Audrey.” 

 

“Emma, no,” Audrey whispers. She’s panicking, overwhelmed, because what is this going to mean for them? For her? For her heart? “I’m not your soulmate. This could never work. I’m gonna get hurt, you’re gonna get hurt—”

 

“Audrey, stop. Listen to me,” Emma orders. Audrey instantly shuts up, and Emma softens, something like affection shining in her eyes. “You told me back in February that soulmates don’t define us. And you were right. My so-called _soulmate_ is currently sitting in a federal correctional center,” she says fiercely, eyes now burning bright with an emotion Audrey can’t quite name. “You think I’d rather spend my life pining over him? _Screw_ that. The great thing about life is that you don’t have to listen to what other people think you should be. You can choose your own destiny. And I’m choosing you.” 

 

Audrey’s never really thought herself to be much of a crier, but tears spill down her cheeks as she hears Emma’s words. _She’s choosing you. She_ wants you. And maybe the logistics of their relationship is going to be complicated, maybe her father might not approve or their friends might think they’re moving too fast — but in this moment, Audrey doesn’t care. Because Emma just said _fuck it_ to the whole concept of soulmates. She’s _choosing_ Audrey. 

 

Then their lips meet, and all talk of choice falls away. It’s just them. Emma and Audrey. The way it always should’ve been.


	3. three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> final chapter. thank you for all of your support! it is greatly appreciated. much love to you all.

The thing about being able to make choices is that sometimes, you make the wrong one.

 

This is what, five months later, Audrey sits in her bedroom and explains to Emma. “The truth is, the soulmate system works so well for a reason,” she says softly, unable to look her soulmate in the eyes as she does so. She knows that if she does, she won’t be able to continue, because she’d bet that right now, Emma’s eyes are filling with tears. And that's not something Audrey can handle if she wants to go through with this. “I’m not your soulmate because _something_ in you knows that I’m not right for you. And maybe you’re right for me, and yes, you made the choice to date me whether or not I was your soulmate — but Em, I think you made the wrong choice. You shouldn’t force yourself to be with me just because you think it's gonna make me happy. You deserve the world. And I can’t give you that,” she finishes. Her lip is trembling as she says it, but this has to be done. It’s what’s best for both of them.

 

“Audrey, I don’t _want_ the world,” Emma whispers, grabbing for her hand, but Audrey jerks away from her touch. Holding Emma’s hand through this will only make it harder on both of them. 

 

“Look, Em, the point is, we’re not right for each other,” Audrey insists, pushing herself to make her tone a little harsher. If she does this gently, Emma won’t take her seriously. “You’re settling with me. And I don’t want to be the person someone settles for; I want to be their first choice. So thank you for everything — seriously, I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to repay you for what you’ve done for me — but I think we’re done here.” 

 

“ _Audrey_ ,” Emma pleads. “Stop. This is crazy. Did I — did I do something? Tell me, what can I do to fix this—”

 

“No, Emma, _you_ stop,” Audrey cuts her off. It tears at her heart to be snarling at her soulmate like this, but it’s what Emma needs to hear to accept this, and if that’s what Emma needs, Audrey’s not going to deny her of it, no matter how hard it is for her. “I said we’re done here. Please leave,” she adds, a little quieter now.

 

“Auds—”

 

“ _Leave_ ,” Audrey growls. A small sob escapes from Emma’s mouth, and it makes Audrey wants to die, but she stays sitting on the bed, staring up at the ceiling and trying not to cry, until she hears the slam of her bedroom door and, eventually, the loud roar of a car engine rumbling to life outside. 

 

It’s only then that Audrey allows herself to break down.

 

∞

Maybe this warrants an explanation. See, Audrey and Emma have been going out for five months, ever since that day in Audrey’s bedroom when Emma had chosen her. And things have been great, except the day that Audrey accidentally overheard Emma telling Brooke, “Yeah, maybe I settled.” 

 

Her blood had run cold. Because this is what she’d been scared of; from day one, she’s worried that Emma might be settling by being with her, that Emma might not be allowing herself to be free and find someone else who could make her happier, even if they’re not her soulmate. She’s always scared that Emma just loves her because she thinks she should, because she thinks it’ll make Audrey happy since Emma is her soulmate. But what Emma doesn’t understand is that if she’s not truly happy, Audrey can’t be happy. And Audrey would rather see her vibrant, happy and _not_ settled with someone else than content, chained down and settling with her. 

 

She also knows that Emma still has dreams about Will, Eli, and Kieran. The boy she couldn’t save, the boy she didn’t know she had to, and the boy who had killed them both. And yeah, maybe it’s because Emma is still haunted by their actions, but it’s just another reminder that there will always be other people who will love Emma and be better for her than Audrey ever could. Emma might claim she doesn’t believe it, but it’s the truth: when she’s dating Audrey, she’s dating a monster.

 

So she lets her go that day in her bedroom. She says the harsh words that need to be said and does all the things she never thought she could. Because Emma deserves better. And if this is what Emma needs to see to believe that, then so be it.

 

It’s the hardest thing Audrey’s ever done. But it’s for Emma, so she takes the pain as it comes and accepts that she’ll probably end up alone.

 

∞

It is March, the rainy season, and Audrey’s grateful that at least the weather reflects her mood. Emma sends her a dozen texts, asking for an explanation, a solution, an answer, but Audrey just blocks her number. Avoiding her at school is harder, and Emma comes up to her a million times, but Audrey quickly learns the art of walking away and saying nothing. _Remember, it’s for Emma_ , she has to keep reminding herself.

 

It is April, and their daffodils are probably in vivid yellow bloom. She and Emma should be there, reminiscing, but instead Audrey watches from across the room as her soulmate throws her head back and laughs at one of Noah’s corny jokes. She misses her, but — _remember, it’s for Emma,_ she has to keep reminding herself.

 

April comes and goes, and then it is May. They were supposed to go to prom together; back in March, when they were still together, Emma had already shown her a few different prom dress options, shorter ones for Audrey and longer ones for her. She’d been so excited, this being the first year they were old enough to go to prom, and Audrey spends the first half of May miserable, cringing at all the stupid “promposals” but secretly wishing she could do one of those for Emma (she’s a hopeless romantic and eats those kinds of things up). 

 

It’s May 15th, the day before prom, when Brooke tells her to come over to her place after school. Audrey’s a little apprehensive, but she shows up anyway, despite her slight fear that this could be a trap of some sort, a guilt-trip into forcing Emma to be fake-happy with her again. 

 

It’s not, thankfully; Brooke’s just lounging on the sofa, a bottle of Cheerwine on the coffee table, when Audrey strolls in. “Sorry I’m late,” Audrey says, dropping her bag on the floor and joining Brooke on the couch. “That Cheerwine for me?”

 

“It’s fine, I had to go pick up your surprise anyway,” Brooke tells her. “And yeah, the Cheerwine’s for you. Since when have you ever known me to drink glorified diabetes in a can?” 

 

Audrey laughs at that, Brooke’s style of humor the perfect pick-me-up, and Brooke grins as she reaches behind the sofa for something and lays a black dress bag at Audrey’s feet. “Wait, what? I thought the Cheerwine was my surprise,” Audrey says, puzzled.

 

“Well, I’m a good friend. I got you both. Now open the bag,” Brooke insists. Audrey hesitates, but when Brooke gives her the quintessential Brooke Maddox Death Glare, she quickly reaches for the zipper and opens the garment bag.

 

Her breath catches at what she sees inside. It’s the prom dress that Emma had shown her back in March. The dress is black, short and skater-style, but the lace detailing is what elevates it to prom level. It’s still probably not as fancy as the other dresses at prom will be, but Emma had deemed it perfect for her. 

 

It should make her happy, but it’s also a painful reminder of what she’s lost. “Brooke… how did you know?” Audrey whispers. 

 

“Emma’s been gushing over prom for _months_ , Audrey. She showed me this dress for you way before she showed it to you,” Brooke laughs.

 

“This is too much. I can’t accept this. I’m not even going to prom. Thank you, but I can’t.” Audrey hastily zips up the bag and tries to give it back to Brooke, but the blond girl won’t take it from her.

 

“Audrey, you and Emma may be broken up for whatever stupid reason, but you are _not_ skipping out on us. This is Noah’s last chance at prom,” Brooke reminds her. “You’ve gotta be there to give him a cheesy best friend slow dance, at least.” Audrey inhales sharply; her friend’s right. Noah is a senior, and although she’ll still have him next year (he’s taking a gap year for some much-needed R &R), this is her last opportunity to make some quintessential high school memories with him. She can’t deny her best friend of that.

 

“Plus,” Brooke adds, pulling a thick piece of paper out of her back pocket, “you’ve already got a ticket.”

 

Audrey gasps; prom tickets were $100 this year, so that coupled with the dress and Cheerwine means Brooke’s at least spent $250 on her. “Brooke,” she says, shaking her head, “this is too much.”

 

“Look, Jensen, this dress was final-sale, as was the prom ticket, so I’m not getting my money back either way,” Brooke tells her. “So either you go and let me be reassured that my money was well-spent, or you stay home, be a loser and waste my money. Your choice.”

 

Instead of responding, Audrey throws her arms around Brooke and holds her tight; she doesn’t know how she’s gotten so lucky, but she did, and in this moment, she’s _so_ grateful. “Thank you.” 

 

∞

So she goes to prom, because in the end, Brooke’s spent $250 on her either way, and she should at least try to make her friend happy. And also, Noah’s informed her that he’s counting on that cheesy dance.

 

Brooke rents a limo for them all, and when it pulls up to Audrey’s house in all its big, white, overzealous glory, Audrey forgets how to breathe when she opens the door and sees Emma sitting in there. She’s beautiful, wearing that sparkly emerald green dress she’d shown her back in March, golden curls all around her shoulders and eyes shining brighter than the crystals on her outfit, and Audrey aches all over when their eyes meet and Emma looks away. Of course it’d be stupid to think that Emma wouldn’t be there — she’s best friends with Audrey’s best friends, of _course_ she’d be in that limo — but Audrey had just forgotten, and now she’s really wanting to turn on her slightly-too-high heel, march back into her house, and binge on a pint of Neapolitan until the pain goes away.

 

But Brooke and Noah are calling her name, even Stavo waving at her to get in, so Audrey steadies herself and climbs into the limo. 

 

The ride to prom is admittedly awkward, in spite of Brooke and Noah trying their best to fill the heavy silence that permeates the atmosphere. Audrey’s never been so excited to see George Washington High as she is when the limo pulls up to the school, and she’s the first one to jump out and head for the gymnasium. Noah catches up with her quickly, Brooke, Stavo and Emma lingering behind.

 

“You okay?” Noah asks as they get in line to hand the chaperones their tickets.He’s so handsome tonight, sporting the same black and white tux he’d worn to escort Zoe at the Carnival last year, and Audrey suddenly feels very guilty, because she knows he’s going to spend his night wishing he was here with someone. Riley or Zoe, specifically. And maybe one or even both of them would be here if she hadn’t brought Piper to Lakewood.

 

“Yeah,” she lies, shivering a little in the cool evening air. Noah goes to offer her his jacket, but she waves it away; the cold will keep her from getting too overwhelmed in Emma’s presence. 

 

Fifteen minutes later, the entire group has all made it safely into the gymnasium, where prom’s being held this year (oh, the beauty of budget cuts). They take pictures together, and it’s more than a little awful when the photographer has her and Emma stand right next to each other. Audrey can feel Emma’s eyes on her back as she walks away after the photos are done, and she bites her tongue, trying not to say anything, until she tastes blood.

 

Someone’s spiked the punch, though, and Noah grabs them a bunch of it before the chaperones find out. The buzz of alcohol makes the rest of the night flow so much _easier_ , and Audrey finds herself dancing like a crazy person with the rest of the group, even though Emma’s only a few inches away and it makes her feel like her skin’s on fire. She’s actually having _fun_ , and Stavo’s snapping photos with the cheap Polaroid he’d bought just for tonight (he says he wants the pics so he can draw his favorite moments from prom later on), and things aren’t so bad this way. Maybe she can handle being alone if she gets to have this, this wonderful group of people by her side.

 

Things get a little more complicated when the slow songs start. Brooke and Stavo break off from the group, and Noah goes to the bathroom for a minute (Audrey sees the shine in his eyes and knows that it’s making him think of Zoe). Then it’s just Emma and Audrey, and the first thing Emma says is, almost under her breath, “They did this on purpose, didn’t they?” 

 

“I have no idea,” she replies. “But knowing the way Brooke and Noah can be, probably.” 

 

Emma lets out a sigh and takes a long swig of her punch. Audrey follows suit, the rum burning her throat pleasantly. Then Emma asks, “Wanna dance?” and Audrey has to stand there and process that for a second because she’s not sure she’s heard the other girl right.

 

If she weren’t a little buzzed, if Emma weren’t her soulmate, if they hadn’t loved each other once, then maybe she’d say no. But right now, she doesn’t have it in her to do that, and so she ends up saying yes, and Emma’s dragging her to the dance floor moments later. An acoustic version of “Forever Young” comes on, and they’re both laughing in spite of themselves, because the original version, the one by Alphaville, used to be their ‘friendship song’ when they were little. Audrey’s mom kind of had a thing for ’80s pop, and she’d always blared it around the house when Audrey’s dad wasn’t home. Emma and Audrey had heard “Forever Young” one day, made up a dance to it, and the rest was history. They don’t remember the dance now, but the memories are enough.

 

Emma’s hands settle on her waist, and her touch is the nicest feeling Audrey’s experienced in a while. They’re closer than they’ve been in months, noses almost touching, and when Emma starts talking in her ear, Audrey’s veins practically crackle with electricity. “Noah told me you overheard me and Brooke that day,” Emma whispers. “What you didn’t hear after you walked away was me saying, ‘Yeah, maybe I settled to everyone else, but I don’t think I settled. I’m where I was always meant to be. It’s why I was given a soulmate who didn’t really care about me; so I could find Audrey, and choose her for a reason beyond what everyone else thinks we’re supposed to be.’” 

 

“What?” Audrey breathes, pulling back for a second to meet Emma’s eyes. There’s nothing but truth in there, and Audrey wonders why Emma hadn’t said anything sooner.

 

“Yeah,” Emma says softly. “But when you broke up with me, you really seemed like you weren’t happy with me. I thought that maybe I was bad for you. So I thought I’d give you space, even though it killed me. And Noah didn’t tell me that you’d overheard me and Brooke until a couple days after the breakup. I knew that if I came back to you immediately, you wouldn’t believe me. So I let us have our space, as much as it hurt.”

 

“Emma,” Audrey gasps. “That — I can’t believe — ”

 

“I know,” Emma cuts in. “It was stupid. I shouldn’t have let us stay apart for that long. But hopefully, it at least showed both of us that we’re not happy when we’re apart. And then Brooke told me she’d bought you the prom ticket and the dress, and I knew I had to tell you tonight. So here we are. And there’s something else I want to tell you.” 

 

Audrey waits with bated breath, heart thudding in her chest, as Emma pauses, takes a deep breath, and looks into her eyes. It makes her shiver; when Emma looks at her like this, it’s like she’s baring every inch of her soul to the other girl. “When I chose you, it wasn’t settling,” Emma begins. “It wasn’t letting myself be a little less happier than I could’ve been with someone else because I thought it’d be best for you. I chose you because I love you. I chose you because you’re the one I want to be with. And I will always choose you, Audrey Jensen.” 

 

They’re both crying a little bit as their lips meet, and Audrey’s vaguely aware of the song ending and the faint sound of clapping in the background, but everything is just _Emma_ and _I will always choose you, Audrey Jensen_ for these few, precious seconds, until they break apart and come back to reality.

 

Noah, Brooke, and Stavo all stand there, and Audrey’s not sure who’s got the biggest grin (really, the width of Stavo’s smile is quite the surprise; he’s always been the relatively expressionless brooding type) but all she knows is that her favorite people are all with her, right here, right now, and she’s finally one hundred percent, absolutely _happy_.

 

“We’ve been waiting all night for you guys to get around to that,” Brooke chuckles.

 

“Yeah, I mean, seriously, we’re happy for you both, but you could’ve saved us all from some seriously awkward dancing,” Noah jokes, walking over to give them each a hug.

 

Audrey’s about to give him a snarky reply to that, but then the DJ announces the final slow song of the night, and she knows she’s got one last thing left to do.

 

“As much fun as I’ve had with you, Em, my partner in crime calls,” she says, winking at Noah. “We can definitely continue this later, though.” 

 

“Oh, for sure,” Emma laughs as they walk away. 

 

Noah ends up stepping on her feet five hundred times, and she gets a little more teary-eyed over the shared memories they discuss than she’d care to admit — but Audrey doesn’t care, actually, because it’s all perfect. Because in the end, the people she loves the most helped her fix things with the girl she loves the most. In the end, she’s got three friends that she knows love her a hell of a lot, friends who all chose to stick by her side through her stupidest of decisions, and an unrequited soulmate that ended up choosing her anyway.

 

And in the end, Audrey Jensen is happy. 


End file.
